Sunday, November 27, 2005
Emotional Turmoil
Just went out with my classmate few days ago to celebrate her birthday. We watched Zathura and had Crystal Jade for dinner. The outing was an enjoyable one and we talked a lot. Seems she's really enjoying her life now and I am glad for her. Some things are just meant to be just like we are meant to be just friends. I am really glad that after all those things we can still be friends now. Why do such things always happen to me? I hope when I go to university I don't have to experience that again. I still have a handful of problems currently which I really don't know how to deal with it. Be it army stuff or my personal stuff. LRI is coming up and there's a lot of things I have to do to make sure that my ass is safe. Outfield trainings are coming up already and I can't dread it more. I simply hate outfields where you have to keep doing drills till people are satisfied. And recently some problems seem to have arisen among the platoon. It seems that my PC is not as simple as he appears to be. Well I really have no qualms about treating the men the way BMT sergeants do it but I don't see the point in doing that. Things are still unclear now so I won't be too fast in judging the whole matter but I will be more cautious with my PC from now onwards.
Recently we just had some exchange with the TNI soldiers. These Indonesian soldiers are really something. They are all regulars and from what I observed all soldiers are at least 6 years old. They had actual combat experience in Aceh and there are some of them who had killed people or saw their comrades die on battlefield. Though the language barrier we managed to communicate with them and found out more about their army. From what I can observe the biggest difference between the SAF and TNI is that we do a lot of things simply for the sake of show while they do things for practicality. TNI soldiers are soldiers and SAF soldiers are like just there to SHOW their presence and deter any hostile force. Well of course it's not the whole SAF is that way. Soldiers from ADF, Guards and Commandos are definitely different. I base my judgements on what I experienced in my camp and hopefully it's not the same throughout the whole SAF. For example, my RSM insulted some of us because the unit tattoos on our faces were covered by our chin straps. Come on was it really that important that we must make sure everyone of our tattoos could be seen? Would that have in any way made us better? No! It's all for show! See my point? The TNI would not have given a damn about such things I bet... I guess many NSF out there share the same sentiments with me but there is absolutely nothing we can do about that. So let's just wait for ORD and get out of this terrible organisation...
My mind's unweaving / 12:42 PM
